Put Your Mask On

I sometimes wonder when I'll start letting my girls wear makeup {"girls" refers to these female children that would theoretically arrive on earth - were the stars to align and the pee stick show two lines} Where were we? Yes, yes...Makeup.

I'm not really sure when my mom started letting me wear makeup. With four older sisters, she most likely didn't notice when one more Maybelline mascara was thrown into the shopping cart. But I suppose that I started wearing grownup face paint during the blessed years of junior high, when the awkwardness of puberty was in bloom. It seems a little cruel to throw face paint into the equation of braces, nightly head gear, training bras and frizzy hair. But this is the way the American girl grows up. It's our right of passage. Every woman must pass the test of the eyelash curler.

And so I grew up. Graduated from college and joined corporate America. I sometimes wished I was that all natural girl that only wore makeup on her wedding day and New Year's Eve. If only my mother would have stood her ground and made me homely! I wouldn't have to put on my face every morning and wash it off at night! On brave and lazy days I would sometimes show up to work without any makeup on. You've already heard about my former Argentinian shuttle driver who would comment on my funky hair-dos. He had his opinions about my hair and he never failed to pipe up about my all natural face days as well. He would look at me wide-eyed and concerned and say "Are you sick, Ashley? Did you have a rough night?" That's when I punched him in the face.

A similar thing happened with the vice president of our company on that day. She came to my desk to introduce me to one of our partner's board of directors. She took one look at my makeup free face and said, "Are you okay? Gosh, you look like you've been crying your eyes out!" Those were the moments that my job security kept me from punching more people's lights out. I smiled graciously and said, "No, I'm just feeling a little under the weather today." "Well good for you for coming into work today", she said. My work friends just laughed and rolled their eyes as I lied through my makeup less lips.

The fabulous thing about my life these days is I don't have to wear my mask.

A) It's too dang hot to wear makeup every day.
B) Nobody cares.
C) Nobody cares - not even my husband. He says he likes me better that way. Although, he may be lying just to be nice.

I mostly do the makeup routine once a week and on Sundays. When I walk around without the mask, nobody asks if I've just had my spleen removed or if a tragic death has occurred in the family. It's just me and my makeup-less self. Happy as a clam. Then, when I do wear makeup I like to think that I look like a movie star. I feel nice and girlie, but I know that I don't have to wear it tomorrow if I don't want to.

I love you Grenada for not judging me.

I love you too, Mom. Even though you didn't stand your ground.

I love you shuttle driver. Even though I punched your lights out.