In America

Blogging is like exercising. I find it liberating and enjoyable when I get in the habit of doing it regularly. But if I stop doing it for awhile, catching up seems kind of overwhelming. I'm not going to start working out again today. In fact, I think I'll go grab another warm roll from the kitchen. But I will work up the guts to write a little something and hopefully my fingers will burn a few holiday calories in the process. Who knows.

I made it home to the mother land. I was a bit nervous about my flight home for some reason. It might have had something to do with the dream I had two weeks ago in which my plane crashed over the ocean. It could have had something to do with the fact that Blair wasn't coming with me. At any rate, most of my fears were blown to smithereens as I plopped my bum in the comfortable and spacious first-class leather seat. Even in the moments during takeoff that I started to feel anxious about my aforementioned nightmare, I fantasized that all of the first class people would be given fail safe parachutes before the crash and we'd gracefully land in the ocean with our orange juice glasses still in tow.

I landed in Miami four hours later with the appetite of an African elephant. I walked up to the McDonald's counter and asked for a happy meal. Just as the friendly cashier was about to place my order, I told him to scratch the kids meal and give me a Big Mac combo meal. Pronto. He laughed at me and made some sarcastic comment about me having quite the appetite for a skinny chick. Smart alec. I tell you I nearly wept as I tasted that meat. I know all of you Fast Food Nation people are ready to have an aneurysm at my apparent love for fast food cows, but don't judge so quickly. Take a trip to the Caribbean, taste the meatloaf hamburger meat that you have to gargle with three cans of Coke to swallow, and then we'll talk about all that PETA hogwash. A second wave of emotion crashed when the McDonald's manager walked out to my table and with a friendly smile asked if everything tasted alright. I nearly kissed him. Exceptional customer service is a rarity in my beloved residence of Grenada.

If I had more time, I'd describe how on my flight to Dallas I accidentally fell asleep on the lap of a pilot sitting next to me. I can't be trusted when I'm slumbering. Then I'd tell you how I nearly died of frostbite after standing outside in Utah waiting for my dad to pick me up. And at last I'd tell you that it feels good to be home for the holidays. Tomorrow I'm back to work in the office for the first time in four months. I don't know if I still remember how to walk in heels. We'll see...

-me.